2008: Year In Review

Happy New Year!

It’s certainly been a hell of an action-packed thrill ride of a year. Here’s just some of the adventurous happenings that went on during the last odd, dozen-month Julian calendar permutation.

This deliciously gritty, dark and realistic iteration of Batman and his maniacal nemesis The Joker will be remembered as the finest for a long time to come.

• Heath Ledger died. “What the fuck? Seriously? The guy with awesome dreads from A Knight’s Tale? He’s dead?? What was he, like, 25? How did that happen??” Well, nobody was quite sure for a while how it happened. Turned out to be a freak perscription drug death that claimed his life in NYC on January 22, 2008. He was aged 28 years. We don’t realize how common these things are until they happen to someone we all know and love. He finished filming The Dark Knight before his death, and his final performance is his finest.
• The Dark Knight is amazing. Really, this movie is incredible. Amazing writing, fantastic acting, and a final, possibly award-winning performance by the late Ledger which will go down in history as not only one of his own finest, but as one of the finest depictions of that time-tested character that has ever been seen. Mark Hamill would be proud.
• George Carlin died. “Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.” Either that or by doing a lot of cocaine in your youth and causing life-long heart problems that finally do you in at a surprisingly ripe old age. Either way, he filmed his final HBO special, “It’s Bad For Ya,” live on March 1, 2008, and it’s some of his best work. Topics include old age, American bullshit, and death. He died on June 22nd 2008 and is survived by his wife, ex-wife, one child, at least one brother, and others.
• The writers’ strike. The strike of the writers guild which started in November of 2007 finally ended in February of 2008. Dozens of shows were forced to either go off the air or find their words elsewhere. Notably, Conan O’Brien and his band leader Max Weinberg grew full beards during the strike to support the causes of his talented writers. The interned LOL’d and PhotoShop’d.
• Britney Spears goes crazy, rebounds. Our favorite baldy gained a lot of weight, shaved her head, and attacked a paparazzi’s car in 2007, so in 2008 she went in for a psychiatric evaluation. She eventually grew back her hair, lost a lot of weight, went back into the studio, and was accepted by what was left of her fans once again. Sadly enough, this was big enough news all year to warrant a place of its own in the Year In Review for 2008.
• Economic recession. The worst since the 70s. Thankfully, the dropping prices of oil stocks drove gasoline prices from almost US$4.50 per gallon down to around US$1.60 per gallon; the lowest gas prices had been for 7 years.
• The Bailout. Banks, investment firms, and other rich people who don’t deserve it get billions of US taxpayer dollars in one of the least popular congressional decisions in recent memory because so much of our economy depends on this handful of banking monopolies. May a god of your choice…bless America.
• An election for the ages THAT ACTUALLY ENDS WELL. In one of the most passionate, crazy, divided elections of all time, an almost stereotypically American match up of “humble old white folks with no book-learnins who are probably trustworthy since they’re dumb” versus “intelligent actually qualified guy who is probably not trustworthy because he’s smart.” In a decidedly large change from the tradition of such a matchup, however, we chose the guy who is actually smart, qualified, not afraid of rational thought, and able to lead. Oh, and he’s also NOT ENTIRELY WHITE. The most truly American candidate ever seen gets elected to represent his people. Finally.

Here’s hoping for a slightly better, if more boring, 2009.